Applications received for Wyrst Bible Diploma Mill!!

Our church secretary has been flooded with applications for entry into Wyst Pentacostal Church's new minastry - the Wyrst Bible Diploma Mill. All approved applications confer upon the applicant the title of "Pastor" and a "PhD in Creationist Sience" for a small fee of $950,324.95 payable over the next 50 years (exclusive of handling fees, management fees and an annual love offering ... and accrued 27.36014% annual interest on the loan). Please be patient as the elders check through every 39 page application to make sure all criteria have been met and your loan approved. Remember that there is an up-front $3,782 Application Fee that will be automatically forfeited if you do not regularly triple tithe for the rest of your life at Wyrst Pentacostal Church.