Biblical Cosmology Seminar

This Saturday Dr Bob Kowdust, PhD in Creationist Science, will give a seminar on the true cosmology of the universe as taught in the Bible. Dr Bob's 57 books and 43 dvds will also be on sale in the foyer. Please support this awesome minastry by a world-reknowned famous leading creationist.

NEW CHURCH BUS!!!!

Our new mega-church bus has arrived and soon you will see it around Maitland. It will do aloop through Maitland suburbs daily before it's final destination -Wyrst Pentacostal Church. Book your seats now! 1% discount coupons available from this weekend's Waitland Muckery.

Pastor Dale K. Whangke's Sermoans

Our anointed Pastor Dale regularly receives messages from God which he passes on to us in his sermoans on a Sunday morning. If you don't listen to Pastor Dale then you don't know what the Lord is saying. Last week Pastor Dale told us how the Lord is saying to double our tithes to help support Pastor Dale in his missionary journey to the casinoes in Los Vegas next year. It will be an awesome time of anointing and spreading the good news to the atheistic millionaires in such evil places. Pastor Dale will require a new BMW and lots of cash in order to penetrate into the heart of this evil to preach the gospel. Please support this reminder from the Lord.

Green voters - we are a recycling church!

Above is how our recycling process works. We find it a very effective minastry.

New suits available

Rend-A-Suit is perfect for male deacons, elders and home group leaders. Order your suit from our Bible store and get a 2% discount on any second suit. Awesome value!!!

Get Your Bachelor of Arts!!!!

The Wyrst Pentacostal Church Bible College is now offering a *Bachelor of Arts in Self Righteousness. Available only to Wyrst Pentacostal Church members. The course consists of 5 bible studies a week over 3 years (ful-time only). At a mere $63,963,75 a year this is a bargain! Another awesome minastry from Wyst Pentacostal Church. Enrol now for 2011!!!

* Not accredited with any institution but approved by the Lord.

You ask, we answer

Yes, ask us any question whatsoever and we promise to answer with a Bible verse*. As the Bible is the infallible word of the Lord it contains everything you need to know. Email the editor of the **Wyrst Pentacostal Church Inspired Awesome Newsletter with your questions and we will print the answer.

* Bible verse may not be related to what you asked.
** Offer available only to Wyrst Pentacostal Church Members who have subscribed to the $49.95 per month or higher edition of the Wyrst Pentacostal Church Inspired Awesome Newsletter. 1% discount for triple tithers.