Friday
Laying Hands On Large Secular Humanist Mouse
Pastor David D Agg lays hands on a large secular humanist mouse.
Our Women's Missionary Team: The Missionettes
Join today and receive a free dvd of Pastor Dale's sermoans.
New Men's Group: Wyrst Anchors
A new Men's Group has been formed at Wyrst Pentacostal Church which has as its goal to be anchored in the Lord. This is the symbol on all of the member's T-Shirts - Wyrst Anchor.
Saturday
Thursday
Protect Yourself With Bible Sword!
Approved and used by Pastor Dale K. Whangke. Free Holy Blood Wiping Rag to wuipe off mess available with every purchase. $199.95 each or family discount of $1000 for double tithers. A true minastry!
Bible Jelly
Buy some Bible Jelly when you get your after church coffee. Available in 10 kg bags from our Biblestore.
Your Own Personal Praise & Worship Leader!
Now you can have your own Personal Praise & Worship Leader in the privacy of tyiou own home. Stand him up and plug him in to hear hours of repuitious praise and worship phrases 24 / 7 such as "Hallelujah! Praise the Lord! Glory to God! Jesus, Jesus, Jesus!! Bless the Lord! Amen!" This may be rented our bought from Wyrst Pentacostal's Biblestore. 1% discount for triple tithers. A great minastry!
Mark 9:34 & "Body Parts For Jesus"
Mark 9:34 "And if thy hand offend thee, cut it off"
Thank you to all our members who have have been plagued by masturbation and have donated their hands to our "Body Parts For Jesus" mission. This will help many people whose limbs have been blown off during the Holy Christian Crusade against Iraq. The limbs are currently being tattooed with John 3:16.
Another worthwhile minastry by Wyrst Pentacostal Church.
The Whangke Shield
Protect yourself from secular humanist new age evilooshunist brain waves with the Whangke Shield. Now available at our Bibhlestore for $789.05 but worth every cent.
Swallow the Sword Of The Lord
Watch Rev Fred Pharta swallow the Sword Odf The Lord at the morning service next week.
CCM Musician Goes to The Lord During Praise Session
CCM Musician Bob Crabtree went to the Lord after singing "Praise The Lord" chorus 587times during the Praise Service. A 6 hour Praise and Worship Funeral Service will be held on April 1st. CCM fans welcome.
EXCLUSIVE - Easter Bunny Performs At Wyrst Pentacostal Church!
We are the only church in Australia where the Easter Bunny will perform this Easter. Tickets $158.75. Bookings essential.
Blinking Jesus Poster
Our Blinking Jesus poster is available from our Biblestore for $59.99. Decorate your house with this stunning stylish reminder of Jesus.
New Sermoan Theme
Over the next 52 weeks Pastor Dale will be speaking about the sin of lust. Audio-visual dvds available at our Biblestore for $39.95.
Bible Bedspread
Read the Bible Bedspread rather than being filled with lust!
Available from Wyrst Pentacostal Church Biblestore.
CCM Superstar in Auditoriiumn This Sunday
CCM Superstar group "Lick My Pussy" performs gospel music in the Auditoruium this Sunday. Tickets $249.99. Bookings essential.
Thank You Jesus!
Yoko Hikari, CCM superstar, performs "Thank You Jesus For Nuking Hiroshima" this week at the Sunday Service. Tickets $99.99. Booking essential.
Maitland, NSW - "City Of Excitement"
Wyrst Pentacostal Church supports Maitland, NSW, Australia, the "City of Excitememnt".
Wednesday
Autographed Picture of Jesus
Buy a personally autographed picture of Jesus for $29.95 at our Biblestore.
*(No refunds!)
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